3103: Exoplanet System

Exoplanet System

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Title text: Sure, this exoplanet we discovered may seem hostile to life, but our calculations suggest it's actually in the accretion disc's habitable zone.

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Explanation

This explanation is incomplete: Explanations for the planets are incomplete and some categories are missing. Do NOT create a table, unless it is impossible to convey that information without it. If you can fix this issue, edit the page!

Exoplanets are planets outside the Sun's Solar System. Astronomers are constantly on the lookout for planets that have Earth-like conditions, especially Earth-like planets that might support life. Unfortunately for many hopefuls, the conditions that made Earth suitable for life are believed to be extremely rare.^{[actual citation needed]} Randall draws a hypothetical star system containing many exoplanets that describe (in an exaggerated fashion) the many frustrations astronomers face when analyzing planets and getting their hopes up, only to discover the planets they found are, sadly, nothing like Earth.

There are a total of 19 planets in the comic. Here are the explanations for each planet, in order of how far they are from the star:

Giant planet orbiting so close that it's actually rolling on the star's surface

Giant planets are often gravitationally pulled close to their star. Here, the planet is literally touching the star, which, given both bodies' gaseous makeup, should cause them to merge.

Hot Jupiter

A Hot Jupiter is typical terminology used in analyzing exoplanets, generally depicting a gas giant (of a size similar to our Jupiter or Saturn) which orbits in a much closer/hotter orbit than our own. Hot Jupiters are easier to detect than many other types of exoplanets, due to their gravitational effect on their stars.

Planet that may actually be in the habitable zone, according to a very optimistic modeling paper by some desperate postdocs

The habitable zone of a star is the range at which water is liquid. Notably, planets in the habitable zone are seen as options for colonization by humanity, which would mean greater funding for research. As such, researchers will go to great lengths to determine as many habitable planets as they can.

There's a pulsar here but it's probably fine

A pulsar is a neutron star, emitting beams of radiation while spinning very fast. Contrary to the label, the presence of a neutron star in the system is probably not fine, since a second star would be source of gravitational instability, a lot of extra heat, and the beams of radiation pose substantial danger to the planets, rendering their surface uninhabitable. Also, it means that this system is technically a binary star.

A waterworld paradise with beautiful oceans and warm— wait, no, we just got new measurements, it's a hellish steam oven

In any scientific field, new information may turn previously established knowledge on its head. Exoplanet research is no different, and a planet that at first seems to be habitable might turn out to be an incredibly deadly steam world. An example of this can be found in our own solar system with Venus, which was speculated to be habitable when its clouds were first discovered long before those clouds were found to be made of steaming hot sulfuric acid.

Planet that could be habitable, if there's a form of life that hates water but loves acid and being on fire

Scientists remain open to the possibility that life might form from different conditions than those found on Earth. That said, the speculation that life on this planet must "love acid and being on fire" is more than a little sarcastic. Possibly to a reference to the what if? article Interplanetary Cessna, in which Randall points out that the atmosphere on Venus is pretty survivable at 55km, except for the sulfuric acid, and way too hot at the surface.

Mini Neptune

"Jupiter" and "Neptune" are rough size/mass categories for gas giants with a mass similar to Jupiter versus Neptune/Uranus. A mini-Neptune would be smaller than Neptune, possibly small enough not to be a gas giant at all.

Lukewarm Jupiter

A humorous extrapolation of Hot Jupiters, assuming that there are other named types of Jupiters.

Planet whose atmosphere is confirmed to contain atoms

With interstellar distances, it is inevitable that some planets will be hard to get a read on. Here, the astronomers can only confirm the planet has an atmosphere, not what it is made of or how thick it is. Possibly in reference to headlines about exoplanets whose atmospheres contain molecules that may indicate biological life, but extrapolated to comedic levels of vagueness.

Earthlike data artifact

An artifact in this context is any error where it looks like something exists when it actually doesn't. This is usually caused by faults in the equipment. In this case the astronomers thought they detected an Earth-like planet, only to discover it was a data artifact. Either that, or it has turned out that Earth itself is a data artifact, which would raise epistemological questions about the whole endeavour of studying the universe.

Cold Jupiter

Implicitly the opposite of a "Hot Jupiter" described above. Used here as another extension of the "Hot Jupiters" running gag, "Cold Jupiters" is occasionally used in real astronomy but is fairly informal.

Potentially habitable void

It seems that the ideal orbital distance for habitable planetary conditions does not actually contain any planets. This would make it much harder to actually inhabit (the notional inhabitants would have to build a world to live on, and would have nowhere to easily locate themselves while the building was in progress), to the implied frustration of the astronomers.

Hot Mars

Continuing the joke on Hot Jupiter. This assumes that if there's hot Jupiters, there must be a "hot" variant of every planet.

Faint dust cloud that will cause several papers to be retracted

This could refer to either Fomalhaut b, a former proposed exoplanet that turned out to be a dust cloud, or Tabby's Star, a star with odd irregular dimming pattern likely due to a dust cloud which was briefly thought by some to be an alien megastructure.^{[actual citation needed]}

Either a gas giant or a fist-sized rock, depending upon which calibration method you use

Even if a "fist-sized rock" were detectable around a distant star (it would be difficult to spot something of this size around our own star), this represents a considerable range of uncertainty between tens of thousands of kilometres and a few centimetres, being perhaps five orders of magnitude. This is not particularly precise, even for a cosmologist.

Mini Pluto

Pluto is already significantly smaller than most planets, thus its designation as a "dwarf planet". A "mini Pluto" suggests an exoplanet that shares most of Pluto's features, but is somehow even smaller.

Wet Saturn

May be a reference to the 'fact' that "Saturn would float in water" due to its density. The difficulties of finding a practical way to test this out, notwithstanding, perhaps someone managed it with this planet.

Planet whose surface may host conditions suitable for rocks

As with planet number 9, this planet is too difficult to get a read on, and the measurements are still so vague it's so far unknown if this planet is a rocky planet or a gas/ice giant.

Somehow this whole system is smaller than the orbit of Mercury?!

No planet, or anything other than an orbital path, shown. But apparently an indicator that all the rest of the given orbits (for Jupiter-likes, Mars-likes, dust clouds, etc, and even semi-inconvenient pulsars) exist within a solar system that is extremely compact, fitting into a volume of space the size of that between our Sun and the orbit of its nearest planet, Mercury.

Title text

The title text mentions a planet within an accretion disk, which means that the planet is in the orbit of a black hole and will be bombarded with X-rays and stars orbiting at close range. Nevertheless, the researcher speaking assures that the planet is in the disk's habitable zone, implying it is a worthwhile option for colonization.

Transcript

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Discussion

"Faint dust cloud that will cause several papers to be retracted" could refer to either Fomalhaut b (former proposed exoplanet that turned out to be a dust cloud) or Tabby's Star (star with odd irregular dimming pattern likely due to a dust cloud, but was briefly thought by some to be an alien megastructure the speculation of which caused the media to lose their shit). Erika lovelace (talk) 19:53, 16 June 2025 (UTC)

Somebody should word it better but the idea of a black hole accretion disk having a habitable zone is pretty typical for Randall brand humor. 130.76.187.35 20:12, 16 June 2025 (UTC)

I think it's actually a reference to Interstellar. In that movie three planets are sort of in the habitable zone of a giant black hole's accretion disk. Whether that means they have to be in the accretion disk, or whether they can be outside it but still in the habitable zone of the disk's radiation, I'm not sure. -- Ken g6 (talk) 00:17, 17 June 2025 (UTC)

An alternative reading of #18 is that the planet may or may not be too hot for rocks to solidify at the surface. (Even if this turns out to be implausible, Randall does stretch the bounds of plausibility on occasion.) 87.75.45.216 08:36, 17 June 2025 (UTC)

An accretion disk is also found around a star. So the exoplanet may be in the zone where planets may actually form. (talking about the title text) 129.27.217.99 08:59, 17 June 2025 (UTC)

An accretion disk forms around my desk. Whether or not it counts as habitable is debatable, though. 82.13.184.33 09:15, 17 June 2025 (UTC)
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